04 Nov Therapy After A Breakup
Do you need therapy after a breakup?
Not everyone needs therapy after a breakup, but it can be very beneficial for some people. How do you know it will help you? I regularly see clients who are recovering from a break up, and I believe that therapy almost always helps. However, here are some signs that therapy might be particularly useful for you.
Your day to day life is being affected
Are you feeling like it’s difficult to cope? That it’s hard to just get through the day? Maybe you’ve got brain fog at work and just can’t seem to think straight. Or perhaps you find yourself snapping at the kids. It might even be that it’s so hard to summon the energy to even get out of bed in the mornings.
However it shows up for you, I can work with you so that your day to day life is not as impacted. We can help you feel more in control of both your emotions, and your life.
You are obsessed
It is normal to think you see your ex walking down the street then realise it’s not them at all. Or, equally, be drawn to their social media accounts, or fantasise about bumping into them and giving them a piece of your mind. Being overly focused on someone is par for the course after a break up, especially if they were the ones that broke up with us. However, most of us seem to be aware of when this might have continued for too long, and perhaps become a habit.
Therapy can help you learn the skills of stepping back from obsessive thoughts and replacing them with healthier ones.
You’re not moving on
If your breakup was a while ago but you just don’t seem able to move on, therapy might be able to help. It might be that there is something about the situation that is keeping you stuck. Working together, we can help you process the break up. Not moving on means living in the past. Becoming more interested in your future and how that might look is part of our work together.
When you still have contact and it’s hard
Some of us have the luxury of going no contact which can ease a break up. If this isn’t an option for you and every time you meet it’s opening up old wounds, then we can work around ways to protect yourself. This is especially important when there is bullying or manipulation involved. While we cannot change others, we can change our own reactions, and work on boundaries and ways to feel safe.
When you are carrying guilt
It might be that you had an affair, or perhaps you grew apart and it was you that decided to call it a day. Guilt can be a difficult emotion to live with but it does have a use. Working out what it means for you and how you can acknowledge that, use it and let it go, is key to our work.
If you’d like to book a chat to see if working with me would be right for you, please click here.